THIS is it!
Just how “unattached” should we be?
Good day to you, New Day community☀️
Ok. Are you SO EXCITED for spring and summer??💥💥💥
Isn’t it so fun to be excited about something? And to be in that whole process of enjoying the anticipation (even though we may want summer, we know we’ll enjoy it so much more with every additional 48 degree day in Chicago😉)
Being able to look ahead and look forward to things, while at the same time relishing the intensity and even the obstacles that separate us from that future reality is so important in life.
In fact, it’s a very necessary part of healing and life-experiencing (and hence a necessary part of your care at New Day!)
In Donny Epstein’s 12 Stages of Healing (what Network Spinal and SRI breathwork are based on), stages 4-7 are part of a realm of experiencing that we call Transform or “The Season of Transform.”💥
Transform is about this very experience of a gathering sense of tension and anticipation as we move forward into a new definition of ourselves and reality on newly empowered terms. Through transform we reach a new level of energetic coherence.
How and when does Transform come into play through our nervous system functioning with Network Spinal care at New Day?💥💥💥
Just like in all the “seasons” or realms of experience (Discover, Awaken, and Integrate), Transform is something we become present to; we become present to an energy, a physiology, a way of focusing and being, and when Transform is there and we become present to Transform, we reap the benefits.
But in order to benefit from Transform in our health and lives, we have to actually BE in Transform✨. That might sound obvious, but I don’t think it always is.
I’m writing this today not just because I want to write about Transform, but mostly because I want to write about what I see as 2 MAJOR stumbling blocks for practice members that block them from experiencing and benefitting from Transform.
I’m going to break down these 2 stumbling blocks below. If you recognize yourself in either, or both of these, I don’t want you to feel bad.
Instead, get excited!!💥 There are golden nuggets here just for you (hopefully all of us) to benefit from that will make a big difference in your care and your life.
The first stumbling block to Transform I will call “endlessly looking forward.”
Stumbling Block #1: “endlessly looking forward”
What it looks like when we start care: We start care at New Day, and we’re really excited about all the things we’ve heard about how the care will benefit us, all the things we’ve seen and read online (and there may be many), all the things our friend/brother/coach has told us.
And every day we come in and we’re looking forward to these awesome things everyone was talking about.
When it becomes a problem: One day we realize that we’ve been looking forward to something happening for a long time. “When is it going to happen? Or. . . has it happened?! But no way! This can’t be. . . IT. . . How could THIS be it??” 😨😨😨
And we start to feel impatient, like we’re missing something. Or maybe we even feel cheated. “This care isn’t what I thought it would be!” we say to ourselves, bitterly.
We may start to have a lot of pointed questions for our practitioner. “Maybe they’re doing it wrong,” we think. “Or maybe it’s. . . us?” we shudder. No. Unacceptable.
The golden nugget of healing🥇: Looking forward to something and being excited is a hell of a lot better than the energy-poor experiences of depression, regret, apathy, or analysis paralysis.
But we need to get to know ourselves well enough to know when we are being present with a Transform experience that is moving us forward, versus when we are using looking ahead as a way to distract us from something in our present experience that we don’t value and are not being present with.
Looking forward is not Transform when we are using it as an escape. We suddenly discover that we were looking forward as a way to not be present.
The present moment IS all we have, and Network Spinal is helping your nervous system feel safe enough to actually be present, which includes being present to things we don’t think we like or don’t value 🌍
Your new mantra: “THIS is it! And by ‘this’ I mean everything that’s happening, not happening, and all my thoughts, feelings, and judgements about that. Which are all there for a reason. Yay!”
Or maybe (if you dare)💥💥💥: “When I hit ‘pause’ in the middle of pressing ‘fast-forward’, I find myself in an exciting new realm of me-ness. And I like that!”
The second stumbling-block to Transform I will call “attachment to being unattached.”
Stumbling Block #2: “attachment to being unattached.”
What it looks like when we start care: We are serene, accepting, peaceful, and open. We don’t have too many questions or comments for our practitioner– we’re just loving the journey!
When it becomes a problem: And we come and go, having our serene and accepting experience, until one day we realize we’ve been in care for months and we might as well have sleep walked through parts of it. In fact, we’re not sure this is helping us anymore. “Maybe I’ve gotten all I’m going to get out of this care”, we think.
Actually, we just heard of a new type of massage therapy that sounds right for us, and so we will stop care at New Day so that we can do that. But then in a few months, we may also decide that we’ve gotten all that we are going to get out of the new technique. . . and the cycle repeats 😨
The golden nugget of healing🥇: As the late, great, Wayne Dyer is famous for saying, it is best to be “open to everything, and attached to nothing.”
I certainly agree that freeing ourselves and those around us of the rules, conditions, rackets and stories, limiting beliefs, etc, that we often use unconsciously as a consequence of our upbringing, unexamined fears and triggers, etc, can be a great way to go 🌍
But being unattached doesn’t help us if it’s actually just us disconnecting and taking an escape from being present in the moment (and the parts of ourselves that are not unattached!)
Being present in the moment might have us feel just how disconnected we’ve been (Stage 1), how bipolar and judgey we’ve been (Stage 2), how stuck we’ve been in our way of looking at things (Stage 3).
Being present in the moment also might have us genuinely connect to reclaiming our power, energy, authenticity, resolving to move forward in life, and making it happen (the healing goodies of Transform!).
Your new mantra: “I’m so unattached that I am willing to see and feel my discomfort with attachment, and my fear of being disappointed. I’m unattached, but interested in, how I attach, and unattach again.”
Or maybe (if you dare)💥💥💥: “I’m attached to my life being an extraordinary experience”
